Oral Attachment Phase of Childhood

A newborn child is totally dependent on its mother for its physical, emotional, energetic and internal bodily system regulatory needs. Our evolution has not proceeded at the rate of sociological evolution.

In 200 years we as a society have gone from being an Agrarian based culture with varying degrees of a nuclear and extended family systems to support our children, to one in 2010 where many families are either both working adults, or single parent families.

It is becoming now a minority of dual parent-mother at home families.  This degree of consumerism, peer group pressure, unrealistic expectations regarding lifestyles and material possessions has created pressure for mothers to return to work ASAP after birth, despite better maternity leave provisions today.

The developing child is totally dependent on its caregivers at this stage of birth to 2 years. Some authors state that the ideal conditions that enable a child to thrive require that they have the close proximity of at least one parent (or care giver) whom is both consistent and sensitive to the child's needs.

We explicitly state that this should be the mother where possible, with the other parent, and extended support providing as much backup to the child and the mother as is possible given modern day constraints. We believe that there is an innate bond, created both spiritually, energetically and physically between the mother and child.

When the mother coats the child in her own Oxytocin during the birth process (not Caesarean section however), that predicates the need for this mother-child connection. This is not popular or supported amongst all forms of child developmental theories, but we believe this to be supported in nature, in science amongst other mammals, and in spirituality.

When a child is raised in an environment with the natural mother that is warm, responsive and dependable, this creates a secure base from which the child can begin to explore their world. The child will look to the mother for physical/tactile contact, and for feeding via the breast.

The breastfeeding position also connects the child to the mothers heart and heartbeat, which synchronises the child’s autonomic nervous system and it enables eye-to-eye contact between mother and child. This allows the mother and child to show their love for each other and recreates the symbiosis that has been the child’s experience in the womb up until this point.

When the mother is consistently physically and emotionally available, this enables the child to feel securely attached to the mother. This in turn allows the child to ground themselves off the mothers energy system via leg stretches that a child does into the mothers belly and upper legs, and gives them the safety to begin to explore.

As the child begins to develop a sense of trust and has positive expectations of other people, it will allow contact with others and will look for similar reinforcement from others that it gets from the mother. The child will feel secure and also “filled up” by the mother, creating an energetically charged state.

This state also relaxes the infantile nervous system and will prevent many infantile issues such as Colic, extensive crying, clinging, rashes, and other issues in the child, but also create a strong defence against Post-Natal Depression in the mother.

It is through this experience of feeling securely attached to the mother that the child develops the capacity when an adult to form satisfying relationships with other people in their life. The child will also navigate this “Oral Attachment” phase with its BodyMind largely intact and without the basis to develop a later Addictive personality.

Copyright 2015 Richard Boyd

Psychotherapy & Counselling

Private Therapy